Ashley Johnson - The Show Must Go On

 

 

I am originally from Maryland, and I knew at a young age that I wanted to be a professional actress. I was one of those weird kids who would lock myself in the bathroom and look in the mirror and make myself cry, because I was getting prepared for all the dramatic roles [audience laughter] that I was going to play. So, I decided that after I graduated from college that I was going to move to Los Angeles. 

 

So, three months after graduating, I moved to LA, the place where dreams come true. Well, let's just say that things didn't quite work out how I thought they would when I got there. So, I ended up getting a corporate America job. But it's okay, because I figured I could work in corporate America while pursuing my acting career, and I wouldn't have to be a starving artist. 

 

So, year one rolls by, I'm working in corporate America, not really doing anything acting related, but it's okay because I just got to LA, still trying to find my groove. Year two rolls by, got a promotion, not really doing anything acting related, because I'm making money, more money than I've ever seen straight out of college. Year three rolls by, year four rolls by, year five rolls by, and I am miserable. I did not move to LA to work in corporate America, I'm tired of sitting at that cubicle, so I quit. 

 

I knew that there were three things that I needed in order to pursue a career in acting. I. I needed a good headshot, I needed training, and I needed an agent. Had the headshot, was taking classes, doing the training, but I didn't have an agent. So, I started sending my resume out. My headshot and resume out to different agencies all over LA. And one day I got an email from an agency asking me to come in to audition. 

 

So, the big day for the audition arrives, and I get to the office building where the agency is, and I'm greeted by the receptionist. She gives me two different scripts. One is a commercial script and one is a dramatic script, and she tells me that I have five minutes to prepare and that she'll come back and get me and take me to see the agents. So, I prepare. I'm ready. I go in the room. I go through the commercial part of the audition, did a great job on that. I go through the dramatic part of the audition, did a great job on that. And I'm thinking, I'm done. 

 

I look over to my right-- Well, let me tell you how the room was set up. It was three agents. One on my right, one on my left and one in the middle. So, I look over on my right and I notice that the agent has my resume in his hand. He's staring at it a little longer than he should be. His eyes stop at the bottom of my resume. He says, “You sing?” And I'm like, “Yeah, I sing,” because I put it on my resume. And he's like, “Let's hear something. Okay, pause right there.” [audience laughter] 

 

Three days earlier, I was having dental work done. I've had a chipped tooth since I was a little girl. So, I decided that if I'm going to take my acting career seriously, I need to get my tooth fixed. So, I decided to get a veneer. If you're not familiar with that, they pretty much shave your tooth down to nothing to put the permanent tooth on there. Well, at least that was my experience. So, they did that. They weren't able to give me the permanent tooth that day, so they gave me a temporary one. And they also gave me a plastic covering to keep the tooth in place, just in case. 

 

Back to the audition. [audience laughter] “You sing?” “Yeah, I sing.” “Let's hear something.” So, I walk over to the agent's desk, and I take a tissue off his desk without asking, mind you, and I spit the plastic covering [audience laughter] in the tissue and then I sit it on his desk. I don't know why I did that. My nerves must have got the best to me. I go back to the center of the room, and I proceed to sing, and boom, the tooth falls out on the floor. [audience laughter] I was so embarrassed. It was so silent in there, you could hear a pin drop. Well, in this case, you could hear a tooth drop. [audience laughter] 

 

In that moment, I had to make a decision, am I going to finish this audition or am I going to run out of here from sheer embarrassment? Y'all want to know what I did? I picked the tooth up off the ground, popped it in my mouth, and sang my heart out. [audience laughter] [audience applause] 

 

So, I'm happy to report to you all that I did end up getting signed by that agency. I was awarded a contract. They really didn't care about my missing front tooth after all, because as the saying goes, in show business, the show must go on.