Rhonda Sternberg - Skinny in Jeans

 

Okay. I needed a new pair of jeans, blue jeans. I hate getting blue jeans, because I always feel too fat and I hate having to deal with the sizes and going to a bigger size and all that kind of stuff. So, I go into the Gap, and I pick out a few pairs and I go into the dressing room to try one on or to try them on. And the first ones I try on, I happen to look at it and they're a size smaller than I usually get and I thought, oh, this is a mistake, but let me try them on anyway. I put my leg in the first one and I thought, oh, shoot, they're ripped. They're torn at the knee. [audience laughter] 

 

So, I thought, well, I'm going to try them on anyway just in case they fit and then I can get another pair without the tear. But then, I put my left leg in the other one and I say, well, that's torn at the knee too. How could this be? And then I said, oh my God, these are ripped jeans. This is what the kids get. I'm 73 years old. I can't have ripped jeans. However, they fit and they fit in the smaller size and they felt good and I felt a little sexy. [audience laughter] [audience cheers and applause]

 

So, I said, well, let me go look at them in the mirror. So, I go out into the three-way mirror, and I'm looking at them and I say to the sales guy, who was this young adorable guy, probably 22 years old, 23 years old, he was perfectly dressed and he said, “They look good.” And I said, “But I'm 73 years old.” And he said, “There's no age as to style. You can do it.” And I said, “But ripped jeans? What will my friends say?” And he says, “You tell them it means freedom.” [audience laughter] And I thought, well, freedom is okay. So, I'm looking at them. [audience laughter] 

 

He said, “Look, I can go get you another pair. I can get you the same jeans without the rip.” And I'm thinking, but God, what if they don't fit and then they're the smaller size and all of that? There's a piece of me that actually wanted the ripped jeans, but I didn't know what to do. This other saleswoman was there and she said, “You know, maybe you need to start small.” And I said, “What do you mean? They're as small as I can get?” [audience laughter] And she said, “No, no, I mean, just a little rip, you know, a little rip at the top, not the knees. That's kind of advanced ripped jeans, [audience laughter] but a little rip at the top would be good.” So, I said, “No, no. If I do this, I'm going all the way.” [audience laughter] 

 

So, I looked at the guy and I said, “You know, your grandmother wouldn't do this.” And he said, “Oh, my grandmother would do this.” [audience laughter] And I said, “Really?” I'm looking at him and I thought, well, maybe his grandmother is like 50. [audience laughter] And I said, “So, how old is your grandmother?” And he said, “She is 75.” And I said, “75 and she wears ripped jeans?” And he said, “Yes. And she's gorgeous, stunning.” So, I took them. [audience laughter] [audience cheers and applause] 

 

And there's a PS to this. I feel that even if I feel I'm really a beautiful person on the inside, sometimes it's just okay to be vain. Thank you.