James Fitzgerald - The Scarlet Ranger

 

 

So, growing up in a single parent home, me and my older brother spent a lot of time together. We were close in age, and frequently found ourselves going to the same school. And because it was just the two of us, it was continuously reinforced that any time that there were no adults around, that it was my older brother's responsibility to take care of me, to make sure I was okay, to be my protector. In my mind, all those things mean the same thing. It means that you're going to do what I say in order to keep me happy. 

 

Now, after school, me and my older brother had about an hour and a half alone before any adults joined us at our grandmother's house. This time was supposed to be spent doing homework, and chores and anything else that needed to get done before my grandmother got off work and made it home. 

 

Today is going to be a change of plans, because what needs to happen is I need to watch the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Now, the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers is about five teenage superheroes who are fighting aliens and monsters protecting the earth. What more can you ask? [audience laughter] I'll tell you what you can ask for. You can ask for what's going on right now in my life, which is the Green Ranger saga. [audience laughter] This is a storyline about an evil Green Ranger that's coming out that has the same powers as the rest of them, they got to figure out how to make it happen. So, for me, my life has stopped, because I'm at the pinnacle of my childhood. [audience laughter] 

 

So, when we get to my grandmother's house, I'm trying to convince my brother, “Hey, what we need to do instead of our chores or homework, we need to watch television.” And in my mind, I'm thinking, “We need to watch Power Rangers.” Now, there's only one television at my grandmother's house, and it's in her living room. Let me pause to give you a mental image of my grandmother's living room. 

 

Everything is white, the carpet's white, the couch is white, the curtains are white, the walls are white. It's like looking into a blizzard. [audience laughter] The only color coming from this room is coming from the television. But this is sacred ground for my grandmother. There's definitely no kids that are allowed in this room. Definitely no food or drinks. But for me, this is a special occasion, because we have the Green Ranger saga going on. [audience laughter] So, I definitely convinced my brother not only to go into this sacred place in my grandmother's house to watch television, but I say, “Hey, we can't do this without some snacks.” [audience laughter]

 

So, we're raiding the refrigerator, we're getting all the chips, we're getting the cherry Kool-Aid, we're getting everything that we need to make this an epic day. So, we started to get loaded up in the living room, and I'm telling him, I'm like, “Hey, listen, we'll make sure all this is cleaned up. We won't leave any evidence. It'll be like we were never here.” [audience laughter] 

 

So, he's game. We're loaded up in the living room, we turn on the TV and I'm thinking, my brother is on the same page. It’s me he's going to turn it straight to the Power Rangers. He doesn't. He turns it to a baseball game. “No biggie.” I tell him his mistake. [audience laughter] An argument ensues. And for me, right now, I'm not seeing anything on this television, but what I am seeing is red. And speaking of red, I have this cup of red Kool-Aid in my hand, and instinctively, I throw it at him. 

 

Oh, time stops. [audience laughter] And this red blob is floating in the air. And for me, it's like a scene out of the Matrix. It’s bullet time, and he easily dodges all this Kool-Aid, which goes all over the carpet, all over the curtains, all over the couch, all over the walls. It looks like a CSI crime scene in here. I already know the first officer on the scene is going to be my grandmother, so I am panicking. 

 

Now, my brother is jumping into his normal position of trying to calm me down, so I don't go flying through the roof. He's like, “Everything's going to be okay. I'm going to take care of you. We are a team, just like the Power Rangers. What we're going to do is we're going to find something to fix this mistake.” I don't know what he had in mind, cleaning supplies, some paint, a DeLorean time machine. I didn't know what he thought was going to be able to fix this mistake. But he continues on trying to calm me down. I don't know exactly what he's saying, because in my mind, I'm not listening to the words that are coming out of his mouth, I'm trying to figure out how to get out of this situation. 

 

As we're trying to figure this out, as we're scouring the house for anything that can help us, the one sound that neither one of us wanted to hear starts to fill the room. And it's the sound of my grandmother driving up her driveway. I'm beginning to think to myself, “Oh, well, I've lived a good life.” [audience laughter] And yet again, my brother's saying to me, “No problem. As long as we stick together, everything's going to be fine. You're going to be okay.” 

 

But before we know it, our grandmother bursts through the door. What is happening as she's taking in her once white living room, which is red, which is funny enough, because her face is turning the same shade of red as her once white living room was. And I'm freaking out, trying to figure out what can I do. Then, it hits me. I look over and I was like, “It was him.” [audience laughter] Pause. Pause, pause, pause. 

 

Now, me and my older brother both know how my grandmother is. My grandmother's like Judge Dredd. There's no investigation, there's no questioning, you're guilty. So, without even saying a word, my brother's eyes are the size of dinner plates. My grandmother takes him away and punishes him. I'm expecting, “Oh, I get away with this, because my brother didn't say a word.” But overall, in our family, that was our tradition. We were all emotional mutes. We never talked about anything meaningful, anything that really needed to be discussed in our family. No one talked about it. 

 

So, for years, all these events were brushed under the rub. My brother never approached me about it. I thought I got away with it. Years go by, the relationship between me and my brother changes over the years. I don't need my protector as much. Things happen, including me joining the military. He becomes a nurse. We live our great lives, but we still come back home, and spend time with our grandmother and the rest of our family in her blizzard living room. 

 

During the holidays, one of the things that we really like to do is we like to share stories from the past. Everyone goes around, and everyone pulls out one from their memory bank and shares it with the family. This particular holiday, we're all together in our grandmother's living rooms, we're all going around the circle sharing these stories and it gets around to my grandmother. My grandmother starts telling the story about the red Kool-Aid saga of 1993, and how she came home from work, and found her walls blood red and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 

 

I'm flabbergasted that she remembers with such detail [audience laughter] this disaster, but the rest of the family is just rolling in laughter. My grandmother continues on talking about how my brother was punished, and how she was so disappointed and his behavior for that day was so out of character for him. And there I am just sitting in there trying to be quiet. [audience laughter] I'm not really considering what's happening in front of me until I lock eyes with my brother. He's sitting there stone faced. I remember that face, because that was the same face that he gave me all those years ago when I initially pointed at him for a crime that he did not commit, and the culprit was still in the room. 

 

So, I'm thinking, okay, I'll remedy this situation. I'll make it better. I'll tell my family it was me. So, I stopped them all, I stopped their laughter and I was like, “Hey, I got to confess. It was really me. He didn't do it.” That was the best punchline I've ever had in my life, because they loved it even more. They were laughing even louder now that they found out it wasn't even his fault. It was mine and I got away with it. 

 

So, I really start to examine what can I do to make this right. So, I asked my brother, “Hey, do you mind stepping outside to talk to me?” He looks at me with apprehension, because we don't do that. So, I beg him to go outside. We finally get out there, and this is one of our first real heart to hearts. Not just as an adult, but ever. So, it's feeling really weird. But I will say, during this time period, I was able to communicate to him my appreciation for him taking care of me, making sure I was always okay and being my protector. Because in that very moment, I saw myself in his shoes and I knew that this was my opportunity to take care of him, to make sure that he was okay, to be his protector. 

 

So, it was the start of a different relationship between me and my brother. And during that conversation, what I ended up learning was, it's never too late to say I'm sorry, and blood is definitely thicker than Kool-Aid. Thank you.