Miles Crabtree - How The West Was Won

 

I was nine years old when it was announced that my fourth-grade class was going to be putting on the production, How the West Was Won. So, our music teachers handed out the scripts, so we could decide if we wanted to audition for a speaking part, which I, of course, did. I looked through the script, read through it and I decided I wanted to be the newsboy, because I wanted to wear the cool newsboy cap and run out on stage with a newspaper yelling, “Extra, extra, read all about it!” 

 

So, we had a week to prepare. So, I go home, I memorize the line, I prepare all these cool moves, and when the day comes, I go into auditions and I give it my most enthusiastic performance. The only other kid to go out for the same part just mumbles the line into his shoes. So, I figure, I've got this one in the bag. This is my part. However, when I come into school the next day, I'm informed that the other kid who tried out is getting the part, because the newsboy is really supposed to be played by a boy. You see, I'm transgender. So, when I was in the fourth grade, I was actually a little girl. Everyone saw me as a little girl. That's not how I saw myself and that is not the part that I wanted to play, but that is the part that I was forced into. 

 

So, I was told that I was going to be playing the part of Prairie Girl Number Three or something like that. Thank God for whoever made that casting decision, because we wouldn't want the parents of Melrose Elementary School to be accosted with an unrealistic portrayal of the history of the Western United States, right? [audience laughter] [audience cheers and applause] 

 

I can only imagine the chaos that would have ensued. [audience laughter] "Becky, did you see the fourth-grade production of How the West Was Won?" "Sarah, I did, and let me tell you, I was completely enthralled until that little butch girl ran out on stage as a newsboy. [audience laughter] Talk about having to suspend my disbelief." [audience laughter] So, anyway, I sat all through those rehearsals wearing a bonnet and a scowl. [audience laughter] I had to pretend to knit during the entire show. I had some one line that I can't even remember now. But I was so filled with joy when our one and only production of How the West Was Won was marred by technical difficulties. [audience laughter] 

 

You see, as fourth graders, we'd made the set ourselves. We painted this glorious backdrop on butcher paper that hung at the back of our stage. Finger painted. It was very heavy from all the paint. And so, during our one and only production, it began to fall down on top of all of us like a tsunami. [audience laughter] But because I was at the front, I was untouched, wearing a bonnet and a smile. Thank you.