Dan Souza - From Hungary with Love

 

Thank you. So, when I graduated college, I didn't want to work. [audience laughter] I just didn't want a job. So, I did what I thought at the time was the smartest thing possible. [coughs] Excuse me. And that was to go teach English in a rural town in Hungary about 30 minutes from Romania by myself. Yeah, I didn't know why no one else applied for the position. [audience laughter] I just thought I was a really good applicant. [audience laughter] 

 

So, I arrived there. When I was in the car from the airport to the village, the coordinator, who her name was Kata, she was explaining to me what was going on. She's like, “So, you're the only American I'm hoping in the village.” And I was like, “Oh, that's cool. I'd love to meet a lot of different people. Who else is going to be there?” She was like, “Oh no, I'm sorry, I misspoke. You're the only foreigner who's going to be in the village. Just going to be you and 1,500 Hungarians.” [audience laughter] And so, I was like, “Great immersion. [audience laughter] That's a hot thing. I don't speak Hungarian, so probably learn a lot. [audience laughter] 

 

So, we get there and I settle into my apartment which turns out to be a small little room attached to the schoolhouse where I'll be teaching. I share a wall with the teachers, like lounge, teacher's lounge. In the teacher's lounge are 40 middle-aged women who arrive about 05:30 in the morning and have really, really loud conversations about, I guess what happened the night before or dreams they had. [audience laughter] I can't imagine what happened. So much happened since when they left the day before. [audience laughter] 

 

So, I wasn't getting a lot of sleep. Every time I left my apartment, I was just stared at. Hungary is not a homogenous society, it looks wise, but it's 1,500 people, and they know who the American guy is who's here to teach. So, I'm just constantly getting stares. I feel really weird. I feel really separated. So, for my first couple of weeks, I go and do the classes, and I pretty much spend my time in my apartment discovering the world of Hungarian beer and wine and [audience laughter] figuring out how to get the BBC on my TV.

 

So, I'm not feeling great about my decision at this point. But the weekend after the second week, they had a school fundraiser at the local restaurant, which was basically a big function hall, a leftover building from the Communist bloc era. It's all concrete, but they strung up a bunch of flyers, and they made it this big thing. So, I went to it. And Kata, the coordinator, quickly informs me that I'm the guest of honor for the night. [audience laughter] And so, what that means-- In various countries, I'm sure it means different things. In Hungary, that means every three to six minutes, someone will come by and do a shot with you. [audience laughter] And so, it's a little bit like college. [audience laughter] And so, I don't want to be rude, so I do a lot of shots with different people in my role as guest of honor. 

 

So, the night goes on, and I'm feeling a little more comfortable because I'm pretty drunk. And then, the music starts. So, some of my students get up and do some traditional dance while a band plays. And it's great. We're all dancing a little bit. And then, Kata turns to me, and she says, “They want you to sing.” [audience laughter] And I was like, “Oh, well, I'm not really a singer. I don't really sing.” They're like, “No, no, no, no, you have to sing.” And I was like, “I have to sing. Okay. So, I will.” [audience laughter]

 

So, I get up into the stage area, and they hand me a mic. I've got a fair amount of courage at this point just from what I've been consuming. And so, a song comes on. But just the backing track to the song comes on, and it's Louis Armstrong's What a Wonderful World. I don't know how many of you listened to that song a lot in high school and college, but I didn't listen to it very much. [audience laughter] Just busy with other stuff. [audience laughter] So, I definitely knew the tune in my head, but the words were very few and far between. [audience laughter] But I just started into it, because I had a lot to drink at this point. 

 

So, I said, “The colors of the Rainbow are pretty and bright. [audience laughter] They're not my favorite colors, [audience laughter] but that's alright. [audience laughter] And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.” [audience laughter] Everyone in the place stands up and a round of applause that I have never seen before in my life. [audience laughter] 300 people stand and start applauding me. And in that instance, I realized two things. One, I'm not a stranger in this land. I am a celebrity. [audience laughter] And two, no one here speaks English [audience laughter] at all. So, then I just go for it. [audience laughter] 

 

“I see Ninja Turtles fight [audience laughter] with nunchucks and bows [audience laughs] They'll kill the foot, as I already know. [audience laughter] And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.” [audience laughter] [audience cheers and applause] 

 

Much like this. Much like this. I feel like I'm back there right now. And I don't stop there. [audience laughter] “I hear my sister fart. We're in church. She gets in big trouble, but I still get dessert. [Audience laughter] And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.”