Lamar Sloss - Cheese, Crepes and Kids

 

 

I grew up with a single mom at home, and only saw my dad probably on the weekends every now and then. Even though I grew up with a lot of love and affection, I missed my dad at home and always wondered, “What kind of dad I would be?” Because my mom was working, I got to spend a lot of time with my grandmother so she could get a break, probably from my brother and I. 

 

I remember sitting at her house some mornings and watching the Price is Right as I eat a fried bologna egg and cheese sandwich, [chuckles] a little grape jelly on the side, because I had a very sophisticated palate as a young man. [audience laughter]

 

I'd probably end up taking a nap watching The Younger Wrestlers in the afternoon. If I was lucky enough, she would make me my favorite soulful meal of fried chicken, hot water cornbread, which is boiling water and cornbread, and you zip into the fryer. Some of these northerners know about that. But good soaping up the mac and cheese and green beans on the side. She was always a phenomenal cook, but she always knew how to make a little extra money on the side.

 

In the summer months in Tennessee, where the air was so thick you could chew on it and walk outside and upper lip start sweating, she would sell fish sandwiches, and popsicles and cold drinks to kids around the neighborhood. I remember helping her run these orders out and seeing how elated these kids were to have a cold treat on these hot, muggy days. 

 

One day, I took it upon myself to follow in her entrepreneurial footsteps and took a box of chocolate that she was selling for a church fundraiser to my Christian middle school. I remember doing so good. I was taking a lot of my classmates' lunch money, and eventually, it would get shut down because apparently, you can't take chocolate and sell it at school, even if it is in the name of Jesus. [audience laughter] I end up going to business school, because I had dreams of going on Wall Street and taking everybody's lunch money. [audience laughter]

 

Somehow ended up back home living with my mom and not really sure what I was going to do. I ended up working at this Crepe Cafe in my hometown, and I made a lot of money, a good $12 an hour, plus tips. So, you can imagine my mom's disdain for me taking this position. But this is where I fell in love with food industry and just crepes in general. 

 

There's something about spinning the crepes, and the steam rising up, and you filling them with sweet and savory fix ins that really captivated me. I think something else that made me stick around was this fair skinned, blue eyed Alaskan girl, name of Samantha, that I would meet, that also worked there. Somehow, she talked me into moving up here, and [chuckles] that's how I'm here today. Yeah, right. [chuckles] [audience cheers and applause]

 

I worked in a lot of food places coming up here, because it's easy to get a job in the food industry. As I continued working for a while, I missed making those crepes. So, I talked my wife and mother into getting me two Krampouz French crepe makers for Christmas. I think they lived on my home counter for several months before I ended up doing anything with them other than making breakfast for myself and the fam. 

 

We started doing pop-ups around town, and eventually business was going well enough that I decided that I would quit my job and start making these crepes full time. So, everything was going great. I was top of the world, being a young business owner and still figuring out how to make money, but happy nonetheless, making these crepes. 

 

One day, my wife says that she wants a baby. So, I think, like most guys, we just follow along and start practicing. [chuckles] [audience laughter] Ended up having a son later that year. This is when I first get to try this dad thing out. My wife goes on maternity leave. Because my schedule is so flexible, being an entrepreneur, I get to stay at home with him during the days. We just would do my events in the evening, so I would do the bottles, and the diapers and take the midday naps with him, which is always a pleasure. Occasionally, we would go out to the Costco with all the other stay at home moms, you get some weird looks going around. It's like, “What's this young man doing on a Tuesday here at Costco?” 

 

Some people would give you a little head nod out of respect, and some people would be like, “Okay, where's your wife?” I would say, “I'm on dad duty today.” You see the look of surprise when-- it's cool to see a dad maybe with a toddler, but most people don't see a dad with a six-month-old out in the store. 

 

Elijah would then come with me to the shop, and we would-- as I was prepping, I set him on the table in his car seat and work on whatever the menu items were that day. He occasionally would come with me to a pop-up, and this one in particular, as I usually wrap our lives on my chest in a little Baby Moby. 

 

As he's sitting there, I'm greeting guests, and spinning crepes and serving the food. I look down at him. He's thinking he's probably falling asleep at this time and I just think like, “Wow, am I really a young black man here in Alaska making crepes with a baby on my chest?” [audience laughter] Not really what I imagined. [audience laughter]

 

But life was good. Business kept growing and we lived like this for a little bit until the spring of 2020, when the coronavirus stepped on the scene, and crepes not being an essential business. Maybe I think they should have been. I really became a stay-at-home dad at that time and watched my son, Elijah, full time. All this was cool for a while. Got to take the naps and play a lot of video games. Call of Duty: Warzone came out, so got a lot of dubs. 

 

But eventually grew a little tired of hanging out and took a page out of my nanny's book and started cooking food for family and friends to make a little extra money. So, I made some fried chicken, and some hot water cornbread, and sweet potatoes with marshmallows and the mac and cheese, which is considered a vegetable in the south, if you didn't know. [audience laughter]

 

Elijah, while he was a little too young to run food, he would help do some quality control and taste testing in his high chair. This is how it went for a while, until one day I got a call that the local cheese shop was closing Fromagio's. The owner, Helen, called and said, “She's selling some equipment and she liked me to come check it out.” I didn't have a kitchen at the time, but I just want to go support and see maybe I can get, like, a table or a refrigerator to store for later. 

 

As we're walking around the place, she says, “You know what? I didn't think about this before, but what do you think about taking over the cheese shop?” I had never thought about taking over a cheese shop. [audience laughter] I don't think many people do. [audience laughter]

 

So, for one, I didn't know much about cheese other than your basic cheddar, Gouda, Swiss, maybe a blue and brie. And two, I was a little lactose sensitive, so I don't think I was- [audience laughter] -the prime candidate for this position. [audience laughter]

 

Anyway, I end up, after a long seven days of deliberation, deciding that we would take over the shop. Before I knew it, I had signed a lease, and was in there learning probably too much about cheese. Did you know that there was like a blue goat cheese from France, or like a five-year cheddar or how toothsome a Gouda could be? It's not a little different dialogue than I grew up with. 

 

It was fun nonetheless. Business was great. We actually did more business than they had done. Not the COVID year, but the year before. I was at the top of the world. So, my wife says, “It's a good time to ask for another baby.” [audience laughter] 

 

She ends up getting pregnant. We go to this ultrasound appointment. As the doctor is looking at her belly, I remember her saying, “Oh, you know it's two.” Out of shock, I think we thought she was talking about 2 o’clock in the afternoon, but it was-- [audience laughter] We got lucky, and had a two for one and got have twins on the way. Pretty cute. [audience cheers and applause]

 

I remember as a kid, my mom would say, I would always tell her, “I got this. I got this.” Most of my life, moving to Alaska, starting the crepe business, reopening the cheese shop during pandemic. I did feel like I had this up until this point where I was like, “Okay, I might be in over my head here with twins.” [audience laughter]

 

Fortunately, the shop was doing well, and we had some systems in place. So, my wife would return to work, and I would be doing the stay-at-home dad again. Fortunately, I did have some help. My mother-in-law was off, or she had just newly retired. I would watch them a few days a week, and she would watch them another few days. So, typical day on daddy duty at my house is my wife goes to work, try to cook a little breakfast and coffee, get her out the house and have some alone time before mayhem starts. 

 

Twins would wake up or Elijah, depending on the day, while balancing, feeding the bottles and getting Elijah his breakfast, changing some diapers and getting everybody loaded up, and then doing Elijah's hair because it's out of control. We drop him off at daycare and no longer really go to Costco anymore, but we go to airport to pick up cheese. [audience laughter]

 

It's obvious when I'm pushing a double stroller in, you get some funny looks from people. Ladies, obviously, look at them. But then there's some like, “Where's your wife? You doing this by yourself?” I'm like, “Oh, yeah, we got this now, anyway.” Some guys, you get a little nod of respect from some of the cargo guys who have kids at home, which is always a good little pump up. But this is definitely the most trying time in my life. We're beyond sleep deprived at this point. I think Navy SEALs go through hell week. 

 

We're in hell season at this point with balancing, operating a cheese shop that I know very little about, and supporting my wife post pregnancy with a toddler still running around getting potty trained. Somebody said it, best when you go from two or one to three. In this case, you go from man-to-man to zone defense. That couldn't be more true in our situation. [audience laughter] But nevertheless, we persevered. As one day, I'm double fisting, bringing my twins, August and Abram, into the cheese shop, the boys, as we call them, come help me unload. As they're playing with my boys, I sit down and wish nanny could see me now and all the love and affection that she's given. I realized that I had become the dad that I wanted. Not only that I wanted, but the dad I never have and maybe the model for or blueprint for what dads can be. Thank you. [audience cheers and applause]