Host: Suzanne Rust
[violin music]
Moderator: [00:00:01] Truth or dare? How about both? This fall, The Moth is challenging what it means to be daring. We're not just talking about jumping out of airplanes or quitting your job, we're talking about the quiet courage to be vulnerable, the bold decisions to reveal the secret that changed everything. This fall, The Moth Mainstage season brings our most powerful stories to live audiences in 16 cities across the globe. Every one of those evenings will explore the singular theme of daring. But the stories and their tellers will never be the same. So, here's our dare to you: experience The Moth Mainstage live. Find a city near you at themoth.org/daring. Come on, we dare you.
[suspense music and lines from the movie, Jaws]
Brody: [00:01:01] You're going to need a bigger boat.
Suzanne: [00:01:04] Welcome to The Moth. I'm Suzanne Rust. This summer marks the 50th anniversary of the release of Jaws in theaters, which we probably gave away by playing that clip up top. But you know what this means? This episode is going to be full of stories about, you guessed it, Teeth. Yes, we're looking at jaws, literal jaws, with stories about dentists, oral care and mouths of all types, because sharks are scary, but real terror, that’s waiting to get a root canal.
First up is Alexis Traussi, who told this at a Moth Education StorySLAM at Beacon High School in New York City, where the theme of the night was Risk. Here's Alexis, live at The Moth.
[cheers and applause]
Alexis: [00:01:50] Since before I can remember, I've always had a Jay Leno chin. And for those of you who don't know who Jay Leno is, I sort of looked like The Crimson Chin from Timmy Turner. I attribute this elongated chin to a stark underbite that I had. And so, my orthodontics career, and we're going to call it a career, started in third grade with a palate expander, and then moved to a headgear, and then went to another headgear and then went to braces. And then, at the ripe age of 12, I got my braces off. I was so elated, because it was sixth grade, I'm starting a new school and I had this smile that lasts for all about six months. And then, I had the most demoralizing feeling.
I just spent three years trying to fix this chin that I hated, and it grew back because of a growth spurt. Are you serious? [audience laughter] And so, I understood that I couldn't take pictures with my friends, because I was going to be judged for my long chin. I knew I'd wake up in the morning and my chin hurts and I know that I won't be able to say my name because it has an X and an S and I have a lisp. So, it's the summer before [chuckles] sophomore year, and I go to the jaw surgeon. I'm super nervous. So, then I get called into the room, and there's the doctor. He does the epitome of scary doctor, which he turns around in his orthodontics chair, and he puts his hand out and he says, "I'm Dr. Bierman."
But then, he starts talking to me, and it's comforting. It's not a conversation with my mom, it's not a conversation with the wall, it's a conversation with me. He starts describing what's going to happen, and he says, "I'm going to go through your nasal passage and break your top jaw and pull it forward. I'm going to break your bottom jaw, push it back. And then I can do, like, I can manipulate your chin." And I'm like, "Okay, that sounds okay the way you put it." [audience laughter] And then, he says, "But for the bad news, you're going to be on a liquid diet for six weeks." And my head immediately goes, "It's going to be the summer, the green market fruits and vegetables. I'm not going to be able to eat them. How am I going to live?"
And then, he says, "You also have a 15% chance of losing feeling in your bottom lip, because we're going to touch sensory nerves and it's going to dull in." And then, I go, "I have to kiss the entire school. [audience laughter] Like, “What's going to happen? I'm not going to know what it feels like. Oh, my goodness." And in the midst of the chaos in my head, he says, "Alexis, why do you want to have this surgery?" And I go, "It's really painful. I have a lisp and I really hate how I look. I can't get over it. I just can't do anything that a teenager can do. I don't want to feel old for the rest of my life."
And so, then it becomes July 27th, and it's 5 o'clock in the morning, and I'm elated. I am about to have jaw surgery. I am going to be able to change, I'm going to have the smile that I've always wanted to have, I'm going to be able to be the teenager that I always wanted to be. And so, I go up to the man who greets you for surgery, and he's like, "Hello. How are you feeling?" I'm like, “Excited.” He looks at me, like, I have seven heads. And he's like, "Great, I'm glad that you're excited." [audience laughter] They put me into a wheelchair, and they wheel me into the surgery room, and I'm like, "Let's turn around," because in front of me, there's an executioner's table. The arms are out to the sides, and it's freezing cold.
And so, they put me down on the bed. I remember the surgeon said that he plays music during the surgery to have fun. And so, I was like, "Can I request a song? I'm going to do this, so let me get a song." I look over to my dad, and him and I, we're on the same wavelength when it comes to music. And so, we nod at each other and we go, “Show And Tell by Al Wilson.” [audience chuckle] So, I get 30 seconds into the song and I black out. I wake up and I have bandages all over my face. There are ice packs here. I'm in a lot of pain, but I'm excited. I go home and I get the bandages off and I go through the pain. But that's what you have acetaminophen for.
You go through a liquid diet and you invent peanut butter, Oreo smoothies. That's the easy part. One day, I look into the mirror and I see myself crying. I'm like, "Why am I crying?" I realize I don't recognize myself. I don't have my chin to say, that's Alexis. I don't feel self-conscious anymore. I'm just nervous that people are going to judge me, because I changed who I am. I took the initiative. I took the risk to change how I looked and who I was. But then, I thought to myself, you did take the risk. You wanted to have this change, and you did it. And so, although I don't look like the Crimson Chin anymore, I think I'll make a pretty good Superman. Thank you.
[cheers and applause]
Suzanne: [00:07:30] That was Alexis Traussi. Alexis' dental woes didn't end with surgery, but they thanked Dr. Bierman every day for his service. Alexis currently lives and works in Amsterdam, recording podcasts and videos for a Dutch design consulting firm, UNS.
So, when Jaws came out, it terrorized legions of children, myself included. And my lifelong phobia, number one, sharks was born at around the same time, I had to have a tooth pulled. Now, despite what seemed like the right dose of Novocaine mid-pull, I was aware of every wiggle, every tug. There were screams, there were tears and phobia number two was born, the dentist. Honestly, to this day, I'm not sure which one affects my life more.
Shania Russell told our next story at her high school, Bronx Academy of Letters in New York City. Here's Shania, live at The Moth.
[cheers and applause]
Shania: [00:08:25] So, like most traumatic experiences, it started at the dentist. [audience laughter] It was a regular checkup for me and my brother. When they showed us the X-ray, they told us that we both had our wisdom teeth coming in. My brother's had his showing and pushing through his gums, and mine were, like, fine, but there. So, they told us he needed to set an appointment and I would need to come in eventually after.
So, fast forward a couple months, we forgot. My brother was doing fine. He didn't notice his at all. He seemed fine, but I was starting to feel mine, and it was bothering me, but I kept looking at him and he was doing fine, so I ignored it. I started eating on a different side and shifting how I closed my mouth, and I figured, "As long as he's good, I'm good." [audience chuckle] But eventually, it got to the point where I couldn't eat or my mouth was really uncomfortable, so we had to set the date.
So, we went in, we were in the waiting room, we filled out the paperwork, we took the X-ray and then I found I had a couple hours in the waiting room because it was so full. So, I took out my phone and googled some stuff, [audience laughter] which was a terrible idea. I read a bunch of horror stories about how people woke up in the middle screaming with blood coming out of their mouth. They can't eat anymore, they lost all their teeth, they can't feel their mouth and I was like, "This is great. This is wonderful." [audience laughter]
And so, they called me in. They showed me the X-ray. They told me I could have two out today. They wouldn't put me under, which was a relief, because I didn't want to wake up screaming or anything. And so, I thought, let me ask the dentist. She'll reassure me. She'll tell me I'll be fine. They do this every day. So, I was like, "Are there any risks?" And she was like, "Oh, yeah, of course." [audience laughter] She told me that when she had her wisdom teeth out, she just lost all feeling in the right side of her mouth. But it's perfectly fine. She's living with it." [audience laughter] And she was super casual about it, acting like it was no big deal and I was having a panic attack in my seat.
So, she sent me back out and was like, "We'll call your name when we're ready." So, when they sent me back out, I went to the bathroom and I looked around for a vent. It was not a vent. So, I was like, “I guess I have to do this.” I went back out, they called me in. So, they numbed my mouth and they started the work. I put headphones in, pretended it wasn't happening. It seemed fine for a bit and then I heard someone say, "Oh, no." I like had a heart attack. [audience chuckle] It turns out they broke a tooth, and so they had to pull out all the pieces. But in the end everything was fine. It went well. I can still feel in my mouth. [audience laughter] I'd like to say that I learned to stop googling things or I'll be productive and set the date to take out the other two teeth, but I have not and I'm planning to put it off for as long as possible. [audience laughter]
[cheers and applause]
Suzanne: [00:11:48] That was Shania Russell. Shania is a Bronx-born writer, whose love of storytelling emerged somewhere between The Very Hungry Caterpillar and Twilight. Since then, that passion has evolved from book reports and fan-fiction to filmmaking and journalism. She is currently writing about all things pop culture over Entertainment Weekly.
Both of the stories you just heard came from The Moth's education program. If you're a young person that’s inspired to tell a story or know of someone who might be, The Moth's Education Program has tons of programs and guidance that help high school and college-age students tell their own story, whether that's up on stage, in their college application essay or just with their peers. To find out more, go to themoth.org/edu.
After the break, you guessed it, another story about teeth. Back in a moment.
Welcome back. Our final story is a favorite from the archive by Anagha Mahajan. She told this at a New York City GrandSLAM, where the theme of the night was Toil and Trouble. Here's Anagha, live at The Moth.
[cheers and applause]
Anagha: [00:13:00] [sings] Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo. I was riding my bicycle having a great day. Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo. Oh, no, what is that? And doo doo doo doo, fuck. [audience chuckle] Shit, I think I broke my tooth. That was three weeks ago. My teeth are still broken, right on time for Halloween. [audience laughter] But I apologize if I slur a little bit or spit on some of you in the front row. [audience laughter]
Now, it was a Friday. I had wrapped up work early and was on my way to yoga. And for some weird reason, this kid's song, Baby Shark, was stuck in my head. I was too focused on my singing while riding that I didn't see the little bump on the road, and I lost all control of my bike and came crashing down, face first and hit my teeth on the curb. [audience aww] I could literally hear my tooth enamel breaking, and there was a buzz in my head. I somehow crawled to the sidewalk and felt a gush of blood in my mouth. As I spat it out, a couple of pieces of what used to be my chunky Bugs Bunny teeth fell out.
I quickly called my husband, Arnab, and let him know he needs to pick me up at the Greyhound station corner in downtown. While I waited for him, the pain started to intensify and I was quickly in tears. But through those teary eyes, I saw this man in a fluorescent vest walk towards me with a couple of hand towels with him. He offered them to me and I hesitated to accept, just because I didn't want to stain them. But he said he saw me fall and he was worried, and he confirmed that those were washed and clean and insisted I take them.
Now, I was already crying, but that made me really emotional, so I grabbed one of them. He checked if somebody was coming to get me, and waited till my husband pulled over and left as gently as he had arrived. Arnab took my bike, mounted it on our car and helped me inside. Once inside, almost out of habit, I pulled the sun visor thing down and moved that mirror flap aside and there it was. Through all the blood, I could see three of my front teeth were shattered at the bottom and my gums were pushed inside. Now, having the visual, it was all just too gruesome and too real. I was really shaking and bawling loudly.
Arnab tried to calm me down and he said, "It's all going to be okay." And I remember thinking how sweet he is and how he doesn't deserve a wife with broken teeth. [audience laughter] Clearly, I needed medical help. [audience laughter] But we were not sure how to get it. Arnab and I have been in the US for eight years. We've steadily built a good life for ourselves here, but luckily, we've kept away from the hospitals and the medical healthcare system overall. [audience laughter] So, Arnab had to google, what do you do when you are in a bike accident and how the ERs work?
So, we were really relying on the help and support of the ER staff to get us through this. They had something else in mind. [audience chuckle] As we pulled into the lobby, the ER nurse sleepily asked, "Who's the patient?" Like, all the crying and the blood through my mouth [audience laughter] were not clues enough. Work with us here, Sherlock, I thought. [audience laughter] Then another nurse who was taking my vitals kept talking over me with her friend about where to find the best Slurpees in town. I mean, [audience chuckle] I'm all for good Slurpees, but not--
I'm like, “This is not the most serious case you have handled this day, even. But for us, it is as serious as it gets.” All we were hoping for some assurance, compassion and perhaps some painkillers. [audience chuckle] I did not get any for at least two hours. We were sent from one nurse to another to another. Had to wait two more hours to get some tests done. And all this while, my wound was not even dressed. I was still using that same towel to clean the blood off my mouth. After five long hours, the doctor arrived and let me know that I had a fracture in the gums and then casually exclaimed, "I don't know how you're bearing this pain so bravely." [audience laughter] Duh.
By this point, I was so tired, I couldn't even roll my eyes at her. [audience chuckle] Eventually, I got some heavy painkillers and we were discharged. But months of dental surgeries and reconstruction are still ahead of us. But in those moments of pain and waiting, both Arnab and I felt helpless, almost lost. And I was thinking, is it the system or is it the people or is it both? Or, is this how things work around here? We just don't know, because this is not our home country? Or, is this our home?
While I was tripping on all these thoughts under the influence of painkillers, [audience laughter] I felt the towel in my hand, and it reminded me of the kindness of this one man. And for some reason, painkillers, [audience chuckle] I felt in that moment that this towel had given me the strength, and his kindness had given me the strength to endure all the pain and get through this ordeal.
So, I guess all I'm trying to say, is that there are moments which make you feel helpless, unwelcome even. But for every person, process or even administration that makes you feel that way, there will always be that one person who extends that metaphorical towel of welcome, compassion, empathy and comfort, and that makes you believe it's all worthwhile. And this can be home. This indeed is home. I will soon be back on my bike and I will be singing [audience chuckle] [sings] Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo. Thank you.
[cheers and applause]
Suzanne: [00:19:23] That was Anagha Mahajan. Anagha was born and raised in a small town in India, and loves telling stories about growing up there in the 1990s. She's a technical program manager at Google and enjoys hiking and hosting friends for boardgames. She lives in California with her husband, four-year-old child Auggie, and their Akita dog Radley.
That's it for this episode. From our mouths to yours, we hope that all your dental visits are as smooth and painless as possible.
Marc: [00:19:51] Suzanne Rust is The Moth's Senior Curatorial Producer, and one of the hosts of The Moth Radio Hour. In addition to finding new voices and fresh stories for The Moth stage, Suzanne creates playlists and helps curate special storytelling events.
Anagha Mahajan's story was coached by Jenifer Hixson. Special thanks to The Moth's EDU team and instructors for their coaching of Alexis Traussi and Shania Russell's stories.
This episode of The Moth Podcast was produced by Sarah Austin Jenness, Sarah Jane Johnson and me, Marc Sollinger. The rest of The Moth’s leadership team includes Sarah Haberman, Christina Norman, Jenifer Hixson, Kate Tellers, Marina Klutse, Suzanne Rust and Patricia Ureña.
The Moth Podcast is presented by Audacy. Special thanks to their executive producer, Leah Reis-Dennis. All Moth stories are true, as remembered by their storytellers. For more about our podcast, information on pitching your own story and everything else, go to our website, themoth.org.